Something I Missed While On Vacation: 31 Million Ashley Madison Users Have Explaining To Do…


I have not paid that much attention to the goings-on over the hack of Ashley Madison – I tried to explain the fuss to my kids and I said to them that it was a dating site for married people to meet other married people for… ummm… naked twister.  No, I didn’t say that.  I said it was a site for married people to meet other married people so they could become friends and go out sometimes.

While we were on vacation, there was a list released by the hacking group which put some or all of the information of the 31 million users out for public consumption.

I was a bit surprised that of that 31 million, 26 million were men, and 5 million women which means that either the data is skewed, that the 5 million women were very much in demand and quite busy or that 10’s of millions of men never found a twister partner.

My interest in Ashley Madison and parent company Avid Life Media (ALM) only lies in the fact that they are a Canadian company and that the site was created, born and raised here in Toronto.  I might one day look to see if I recognize any of the names, but to be honest, I don’t care.  I, like you, am busy with real things, like family, work, and other activities, and what other people do with their time and in their relationships is 100% their own business and no one else’s.

I think I have always taken this standpoint even from way back in the day when I was The Urban (Not Yet A) Daddy, and I want my kids to look at the world the same way if at all possible.  Marriage, relationships, friends, religion… None of this is my business unless you are forcing your views on me, and those views oppress, harm or place others in a lower standing than the rest of us.  Then I have a problem with it.

At the end of the day, strip away everything and you have a planet with land, and humans.  We are all the same.

I hope the Ashley Madison scandal blows over.

I feel bad for the people involved – I hope they choose to continue life as they know it, or that they get help and work out their issues.  I also don’t like to see personal data hacked, stolen, and made public, but I also admire the work of these hackers for taking a stand (if it turns out to be that and not a bitter former employee) and with all of the secrecy in the world it’s nice to know the truth every now and then.  It’s how we can hold people accountable.

What is your take on this?

How would you explain this to your children?

 

Here is the article that I read which helped bring me up to speed;

What’s in the Ashley Madison database that hackers released online

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As a Father, if you’re going to disappoint some of them, you might as well disappoint all of them…


I wanted to post this last week when it happened but did not get a chance but since that night this scenario has come up over and over again, just not to the same extent.

The night it first happened, was a special night in the Urban Daddy household.  Determined to get back into some semblance of an exercise routine, I made up my mind early in the day that I would run on the treadmill that evening, by hook or by crook.

Since I’m still within my 3 month window of a new job with much greater responsibility, and the stress / excitement of meeting new people, learning new systems, figuring out acronyms and being on my toes all the time, I have found myself quite exhausted by about 10pm, which means that is around the time I tend to fall asleep on the couch when trying to; watch TV, read, blog, play Cityville, or… exercise.  Very unusual for me as I’m used to 1-2am sleeps with 6am wake-ups.

This night was exercise night and the beginning of a new schedule for me.

New Routine – Thursday night.:

Eat dinner with the kids (not unusual at all)

Stewie piano lessons

Give Berry a bath

Linus annoy mummy during math lesson

Then switch…

Linus piano.

Berry and Stewie before bed snack.

All kids in bed by 8:15 and I’m going to treadmill for 1/2 hour before I have a shower, then run out to grab milk.  I really want to begin getting to bed at a reasonable hour – it is currently 12:33am so that is not happening.

Then it all fell apart.

Urban Mummy wanted to talk to me.  We didn’t talk much the previous night and she barely saw me today and she wanted to chat but I patted my flabs and said, “Sorry hun!  I have to treadmill”.  She was disappointed.

I went to check on the kids and here is what happened;

Walked into Stewie’s room, and surprisingly he was still awake.

“Stay with me, Daddy”, he said.

“Sorry kiddo.  I have to treadmill right now so I can shower, get milk and talk to your mother before she falls asleep or kills me”.

He was disappointed.

I went from there to Linus’ room where he was sitting up in his bed too.

“Lay with me, Daddy and tell me a story, please”.

“Can’t buddy.  Have to go treadmill before mummy goes to sleep.

He gave me his pouty disappointed face.

Out I marched and right into Berry’s room where surprisingly she was up too.

“Rub my back and stay with me Daddy”, she said.

“Sorry, sweetie, I have to treadmill.  Sing for me and I will tuck you in when I’m done.”

She was not happy either because she didn’t sing for me and she usually does.  “Bla Bla Blacksheet”

Out I walked.

4 people wanted me to stay with them and 4 people got nothing.

Like I said in the title.  Go big or go home.  If you’re going to disappoint someone you might as well disappoint all of them.

Dads…  You turn.  What would you have done?

2010 Year in Review – Entertainment news that mattered to me…


Here is my take on what mattered in the entertainment world during 2010.

 I started this in November but as the list got bigger and bigger, I started to get worried that I would never get to post it.  Well, here it is…   So let’s begin this urban daddy’s look at 2010 with;

The most memorable moments of the year.

On January 12th, a 7.0 magnitude earthquake devastated Haiti 10 miles outside the country’s capital Port-au-Prince, taking almost 250,000 lives and reducing the city to rubble.  While the public outpouring of support and money was appreciated, I feel the world missed an opportunity to do the right thing and rebuild this country and provide homes, clean water and hope for the survivors.

Just over a week after winning her first Academy Award (Oscar), Sandra Bullock was blindsided when her husband of five years, some unheard of douche bag named Jesse James (parents who call kids that should be sent to jail or charged with neglect… Or the guy who names himself this might be a wee bit arrogant, no? admitted he had been unfaithful with some tattooed nazi-chick. They divorced.

Heidi Montag’s a role model for the plastic industry, not little girls…
While Heidi Montag faced several personal setbacks – filing for divorce from “husband” Spencer Pratt in July and losing her plastic surgeon to a fatal car crash in August – 2010 will go down as the year the “reality star” underwent a shocking 10 plastic surgery procedures in one day.  She went from looking young and kind-of hot, to old, plastic and about 50 years old, where she will remain (barring a drug overdose or premature end from yet another procedure) for the next 200 years. Gross.

While I really didn’t know much, or have a special appreciation for Brittany Murphy, I did find it spooky that 5 months after her death, blamed on an OD, her husband Simon Monjack was found dead in the couple’s home. It turns out he died from the same causes – pneumonia and severe anemia – that killed her.

What would a year in review be without mentioning that lunatic Mel Gibson. 2010 brought this wack-job back into the spotlight after his split from girlfriend Oksana Grigorieva ignited a heated custody battle over baby daughter Lucia. Grigorieva claimed that Mel had assaulted her (punched her and broke her nose) which led to a domestic violence investigation, and soon multiple audio tapes arose allegedly featuring Gibson’s hate-filled rants hit the web. The “leaks” were funny and made Mel seem closer to the looney-bin than to an Academy award… Poor nut-job.

But I think the biggest story of 2010 in entertainment involved Tiger Woods. Starting with the car crash / gash over his head, to the multiple mistresses each now getting their 15 minutes of fame and the resistance big business had in tossing this role model down the river. There were a lot of people hoping and praying it was not true, and if it were not for the mistresses, I doubt we would have known the full story to date.  Can anyone look at Tiger the same way again?

Now let’s turn out attention to the most memorable (at least for me) splits of the Year:

1) Courtney Cox and David Arquette.
It was an odd coupling from the start, but the former Friends star and the goofy former WCW World Heavyweight champion seemed to have found lasting love, married since 1999. In 2010, Arquette confirmed it was a combination of his immaturity and their declining sex life that led to their divorce. Now he’s spouting off about how drinking heavily makes him feel better… My only question is what took Cox so long to get the balls.

2) Sandra Bullock and Jesse James Cheater Nazi. Previously discussed.

3) Desperate Housewife Eva Longoria and NBA star Tony Parker. Married in 2007, him like 6 foot 8. Her, like 5 foot 4. Longoria filed for divorce in November 2010 amid rumors of infidelity.

4) Billy Ray Cyrus and wife Trish are divorcing after 18 years of marriage (Hmmm… Miley Cyrus is 18…) filed for divorce on Oct. 27. The parents of six children are going to have a hard time finding someone to re-marry until all the birdies have flown the coup. Although with Miley acting out, is rehab or a sex-tape soon to follow…

5) 3 years seems to be the equivalent to the 7-year-itch in Hollywood as Christina Aguilera and Husband Jordan Bratman divorced after 3 years and one son together. She’s already being photographed holding hands with another guy…

6) For Melissa Etheridge and Tammy Lynn Michaels, 9 years of marriage ended in a case of she said, she said as Etheridge said the split was “as mutual as those things can be,” while Michaels says she was “blindsided” and left broke by their breakup.

7) Al and Tipper Gore. After 40 years of marriage, the Washington power couple and parents of four announced their separation in June. The former high school sweethearts said in a statement that it was “a mutual and mutually supportive decision that we have made together following a process of long and careful consideration.”

8) Kids should not have kids! Bristol Palin and butt-wipe Levi Johnston, Bristol being the teen daughter of former Alaska governor Sarah Palin, first shocked the world two years ago – by announcing she and her high school sweetheart were expecting during her mother’s Republican vice-presidential campaign. Two months after the birth of the couple’s son Tripp in March 2009, the pair split, only to reunite this past July. But a month later, they called off their second engagement.  Levi is a douche-bag and he totally played the Palin family and is using them for fame and fortune, recently stating that he wants to run for governor because if Sarah can do it, then so can he.

9) Mel Gibson and Oksana Grigorieva.

10) Canadian Pop star Shania Twain & Husband, producer Robert “Mutt” Lange, split up in May, resulted in her making some TV appearances and a lot of Canadian guys happy that they still have a shot.  But now in December she announces she is engaged to the ex-husband of the woman her husband left her for… Get it?  It’s a real-life wife swap.

11) This one is messed up.  Dean Sheremet was married to LeAnn Rimes.  Eddie Cibrian was married to Brandi Glanville.  Eddie and LeAnn hook up while working on a movie together – Both deny it.  Caught kissing they claim to be “rehearsing”.  Both get taken to the curb.  Then while “single” Eddie and LeAnn begin dating.  I hope they both know what they are getting in to…

12) Mark-Paul Gosselaar (Zack Morris from the TV show Saved by the Bell) and wife Lisa Ann Russell (who apparently was also on the show), after 14 years of marriage.

13) Plastic girl and douche-boy, aka Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt, after 15 months of marriage.  Pratt, who loves his “fame” was quoted as saying this; “Some say if you can’t handle the heat get out of the kitchen. Well, Heidi couldn’t handle King Spencer’s fame so she got out of the marriage.”   Really?  King Spencer?  Where are you now, numbnuts???

14) Zac Efron and Vanessa Hudgens – broke up, not divorced, but is there now going to be more leaked naked photos of Vanessa?  Chances are good.

15) George Lopez and his wife Ann Serrano had been married since 1993, and she even gave him a kidney when he needed a transplant in 2005.   This one stinks, man!

16) Jim Carrey and Jenny McCarthy after 5 years.

17) Kelsey Grammer and Camille Grammer after 13 years of marriage.

and the biggest breakup of 2010… #18 on our list, was Tiger Woods and about 16 other women…

Done with the bad, now the good… Here is who got hitched in 2010;

Megan Fox and 90201 “star” Brian Austin Green, after 6 years together.

Canadian Alt-rocker Alanis Morisette and rapper Souleye (real name: Mario Treadway).  Wonder what she calls him in bed?  No I don’t…

Pop star Katy Perry and the very unusual Russell Brand.

Ottawa Senators hockey player Mike Fisher married country star Carrie Underwood. 

Glee super-bitch, Jane Lynch married girlfriend Lara Embry.

Hilary Duff’s married hockey player Mike Comrie, and in an unusual turn of events, her tooth fell out in the morning.  Lucky for Duff, it was fixed before the wedding started. 

(Han Solo married a broom), aka, Harrison Ford married Calista Flockhart. Calista ate a whole raisin at the wedding to really celebrate and she missed the second half of the evening because she was “stuffed”. No truth to the rumours that Chewbacca served as best man.

Chelsea Clinton, daughter of former President Bill Clinton and Hillary Clinton joined the tribe as she married some guy named Marc Mezvinsky in front of 400 guests on July 31 in N.Y.

Dawson!  James Van Der Beek married some model named Kimberly Brook in Tel Aviv. 

With just six guests in attendance, longtime couple Isla Fisher and Sacha Baron Cohen said “I Do” in a traditional Jewish ceremony in Paris.  Wonder if Borat was wearing that giant green sling shot ball holder bathing suit under his tuxedo?

2010 WTF were you thinking:

A few stories in entertainment caught my attention during the year.  I present them to you here. 

1) Lindsay Lohan.  I remember when she was in court in July, and for some reason she thought it would have been a good idea to have “FUCK U” stenciled in nail polish on her left middle finger.  Lohan, who claimed it was a “a joke,” spent 13 days in jail and 23 days in court-ordered rehab for violating probation in a DUI case.  She’ll be back… In court and jail.

2) Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned, eh?  In April, former NYPD Blue star Garcelle Beauvais publicly aired her husband Michael Nilon’s dirty laundry to his Creative Artists Agency colleagues in an angry, company-wide e-mail. “I found out today that MY husband of almost 9 yrs has been having an affair for 5 yrs with some slut in Chicago,” she wrote. “I am devastated!!! And I have been duped!!” A month later, the mom of two filed for divorce.

In May 2010, a British tabloid captured the Duchess of York, Sarah Ferguson, on video accepting a $40,000 cash payment – and an additional $700,000 to be wired later – in exchange for access to her ex-husband Prince Andrew.

John Edwards’s former mistress Rielle Hunter finally broke her years-long silence in a GQ interview which led to the end of his 32-year marriage – Edward’s wife recently passed away after battling cancer for many years. I’m sure she needed this stupidity at that moment.

Shame!

That was fun!

Out of the mouths of babes


My 5 year old had a play date this afternoon with his “silly friend”, a girl from his class.

Just yesterday he told me that he did not want to go to grade one next year, “It’s too much work / too much writing”, he said.  Instead he wanted to be a “general manager”. 

“Where?” I asked him.

“In your work, Daddy”, he replied.

LOL.

But today when I asked him the same question, he had a different answer for my wife and I.

Today he said, “I may change my mind as I get older, and one day I would like to live in the same house with my classmate / playfriend, and we will work together”.

Maybe this will work out after all… He had zero interest in hockey. Told me that when he was three. “Daddy, I don’t like hockey”… But this silly friend of his plays hockey so now he is suddenly interested. He even now knows who Sidney Crosby is.

And… When it comes to rooting for a team he now knows to root for the Canada Leafs (Toronto), and in the past he liked the team that wore red, and Buffalo, NY and NJ because he had been there, and he liked Florida because Disney is there, Ottawa because a classmake moved there and Montreal because his best friend’s grandmother lives there.

Repost: Thoughts from April 2007


Here is what was going through my head April 2007.

  • Former Conservative politician, until she crossed the floor to become a cabinet minister for the Liberal party, Belinda Stronach is not seeking re-election in the next election.  HA HA HA.  I knew (and probably blogged) that once she became a traitor and left the conservative party, crossing the floor to join the corrupt liberals for a cabinet post, that she would be going nowhere in politics.  Clearly I was incorrect.  She is going somewhere… out! Bye bye Belinda, you turncoat, and take Tie Domi with you.  That former Toronto Maple Leaf pugilist, who was married when you an him hooked up and you deserve each other.  Opportunists.  Besides, Tie’s segment “Win, Lose and Tie” on TSN is brutal.  I turn the channel when it comes on.  It’s painful.
  • In other thoughts… It looks like rain outside… I don’t have an umbrella.
  • I’m really jacked that the Raptors are in the playoffs – but I hate that they are playing Vince Carter and the NJ Nets because I’ll be REALLY upset if we lose to “them”.  Ever since “Wince” left the Raptors, I have always wished him to lose or get hurt, flop on the floor like he did in Toronto and please continue to tip off the opposition on plays in NJ like to did in TO. 
  • I received my grades for my two most recent business graduate school classes… both A’s. Only 4 more classes to go then I’ll have my MBA and can use it to get out of the government.  YAY.
  • Happy to report that my wife and I have something new in common, besides our kids, marriage, house, etc. I love to garden and she does too.  And she is quite good at it too.  We have seedlings now sitting in the living room soon to be headed in the garden, of all these funky heirloom fruits and veggies.  She picked them, she planted the seeds, we watch them grow. Fun, fun, fun!
  • Need sleep… I am painting the basement – kids playroom… It had to happen sooner or later.  We bought some red, blue and green paint – bright kids colours and I am painting the entire space they use to play in.  Part of the wall is going to be a magnetic chalk board.  Wondering how to get the red paint out of the carpet and I dropped the tin and of course it opened on the carpet.. A lot!.  It is fire truck red.  OY. 
  • So let’s recap… Baby up at 5am, I leave for work at 7am, get home before 6pm, bathe and book the kids to bed, then after chatting with my wife and taking care of classes, I set out around midnight to paint until 1 or 2am and then do it all again the next night.
  • Sleep???  Over-rated.  🙂