Posted in Life

Randomness – Yet Quite a Lot about Behinds, Bums, and… Ass

Image of "baby-cut" carrots
Image of “baby-cut” carrots (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

I’ve got stuff on my mind – too much to post at once – but some things I need to let go of, so I dropped them here into a post entitled “randomness” and I waited until there were enough to post.  For those of you following my blog for any period of time you have already realized that I am unable to tell a story by getting right to the point.  There is always a story associated with it, some background, some clarification… It’s a terrible habit.

But here are some random thoughts which have been kicking around for a while – please feel free to chime in!

How do they get those cute little baby-cut carrots? I say they’re grown that way but Urban Mummy said the go through a little mini carrot lathe like machine which whittles them down to size.

Do you know?

If you do, do you still feed them to your kids?

I found out today, May 1st that they are specially modified carrots with more sweetness and artificial colour which are peeled and cut in 2 – the baby-cut carrots that is, the baby carrot are just that – baby carrots.  To keep the carrots from drying out because they are now peeled they are soaked in a water-chlorine mixture which is rinsed off before they are bagged.


I’m not sure how I feel about this.  I’m going to have to run this by my wife who is just about completed her holistic nutrition certification…  Update at 11.

Why are there no Meat Loaf vending machines?

Chicken, veal, beef, pork, spicy, no salt, with gravy, or ketchup… The options are endless…

Should the band Green Day not write a song for St. Patrick‘s Day.  Would this be “their” day?!?

Saw an old draft I had from Chinese New Year – There was a place near my office offering up a “Traditional Chinese New Year lunch” which was advertised as a pulled pork on a bun and a chicken wrap. Huh?!?

I saw something the other day I had never seen before and hope to never see again.  There was a boy – less than 10 years old who was standing on his hands with his feet up against the wall right under the hand dryer at the kids swimming pool.  He was drying his ass…  Oh yes.  It’s not like the change room was empty either… It was packed full of other kids and parents who didn’t seem to notice – or couldn’t care to comment on the fact this was happening.

Both my boys walked by this – strange – child without blinking an eye.  We got into the hall, I was shaking my head the whole way when Stewie broke the silence with this gem;

“Did you see that boy blow drying his ass???  That was crazy!”

“Yes, yes it was, Stewie” I replied as the 3 of us walked out of the school shaking our heads.

“Ass”.  I didn’t even know he knew that word…

Just today on my way into the office there was a woman who had just gotten off the bus and was crossing Eglinton Avenue at the light.  I noticed her because she was wearing these huge boots that came over her knees and she had a tight black miniskirt which went about mid-thigh, and she had very long braided hair.  She was listening to music and was clearly oblivious to her surroundings because as soon as she got halfway into the intersection she must have realized that her panties were falling down because she took both hands, grabbed just below her hips and pulled those suckers right back too.

Too bad for her that in doing so she lifted her skirt up to her waist and the entire street got to see her bum cheeks hanging out of her black underwear as she fixed her stuff and adjusted her skirt back to mid-thigh level.

Without missing a beat.


What a way to start a morning!

Posted in news, Tuesday newsday

Tuesday Newsday

Good news (or not), but the Tuesday Newsday feature is back! In this feature I post parts of the most interesting news items of the day and add my comments to the end of it. Feel free to add your comments too… The more the merrier.

In the news this Tuesday July 24th via Google News.

1) The corpse of a mummified baby has been discovered inside a Riverdale home (Toronto, Ontario). A renovator working in the home made the discovery late Tuesday night. Police said the body of the baby, estimated at about four months of age, was found inside a ceiling of second-floor bedroom wrapped in a newspaper dated from September of 1925. The mummified remains will be examined by the Centre for Forensic Sciences. Police homicide investigators are probing the incident.
Oh oh… Some 100 year old dude and his wife are gonna get their asses whooped for this one once the police identify the remains and track down the seniors in their nursing homes…

2) The Canadian dollar reached a 30-year high yesterday, closing at 96.36 cents (US) – up more than a cent from Monday – after Statistics Canada reported a massive 2.8-per-cent increase in retail sales in May from a month earlier. It is kind of neat to see the dollar climbing, even if it did kill our Scrapbooking business as the majority of our customers were American and took advantage of the then awesome exchange rate. $1.00 US got them $1.30 worth of products, Canadian.

3) The two Arab countries – Egypt and Jordan- with ties to Israel have paid an historic visit to the Jewish state to “extend the hand of peace” on behalf of their fellow Arabs.
Considering Israeli-Palestinian negotiations have not seen progress for seven years, a period in which more than 5,000 people have died in violence, the large majority of them Palestinians, and dialogue is good dialogue unless it starts with, “Find a new place to live”.

4) Troubled starlet Lindsay Lohan could be on her way to jail. The 21-year-old is facing a year in jail after her latest arrest on suspicion of drink-driving and possession of cocaine. She was picked up by police, following a car chase in California, allegedly under the influence and with a small amount of cocaine in her pocket, she was arrested after chasing the mother of her personal assistant in her car early Tuesday morning, Santa Monica police said.

All this happened just five days after she was booked in connection with a May drunken driving charge. Hmmmm. Alcohol, drugs, driving under the influence… What is going to happen first: Jail or Overdose or Britney Spears OD’s first? Role models??? NO WAY. The public is fascinated at watching these two half-wits self destruct in public. I’m sure Paris Hilton is happy the spotlight is off of her. I hope and pray that the earth will open up and swallow these two soon…

I will go on record and say that withing 2-3 years, One of these 3 will go to jail, one will have a mental breakdown and the other will flirt with drug and alcohol addiction and have her reputation ruined. All three will act, sing, or be photographed naked, or have upskirt pictures taken of them… They are trampy and unstable. Fame will eat them alive.

And for you parents stop buying their albums and watching their movies… please!