Posted in Daddy, family, Life, Parenting, The Urban Daddy, Toronto

When Your Math-Loving Child Wants to Express Their Love…


My math-loving child must really love me!

He said;

“Dad, I love you more than a decimal irrational number…”

I tried to pretend that I knew what that meant, but then he said;

“It’s never ending…”

 

Awwww….

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Posted in Baby Boy, Daddy, family, Parenting, Toronto, urbandaddyblog

Testosterone Poisoning: Things my teen has called me.


Testosterone poisoning is a real thing according to our pediatrician.

He suggested that I check out You Tube for a video entitled “Testosterone Poisoning”, and once I have a minute between driving to kids programs and working my job, I’m going to watch it… I swear.

Apparently, it’s where boys, 13-years-old to 15-years-old are being poisoned by testosterone, and cannot be held accountable for things that come out of their mouths.

I thought it was a joke…

 

So here is what Testosterone Poisoning (TP) brought out of my son’s mouth this morning;

“You are the most useless human being on the planet AND the dumbest person alive!”

 

Yup.

Useless AND dumb.

I guess he forgot who gives him WiFi and pays for his phone… LOL.

 

My response… A hug.  Poor kid.

He’s done better, though.  I’m sure your kids have done better as well… Please share!

 

 

Posted in Parenting

What We NEVER Tell New Dads…


My lunch today;

 

Dads lunch

 

All 3 “sandwiches” are peanut butter and jam.  One is crusts, and the bread is challah.  The other which appears to have been leaking out is stale.  The one with the bite taken out survived 3 hours of synchronized swimming practice in a bag, a car, and then left in the laundry room until I rescued it at midnight before bed.

The half eaten, mangled cliff bar is Chocolate Almond Fudge and must be consumed with a lot of water.

I ate the cucumber slices, carrots and green grapes for morning snack.

This is the reality of being a Dad!

When you put all of your efforts into your family, your career, and making sure other things are done, you run to the fridge hoping to take a lunch for yourself and this is what you get.  Not complaining.  At least I had lunch today!  Can’t buy lunch everyday, it’s expensive and unhealthy.  A well balanced, home “cooked” meal it is / was… Sort of.

 

Posted in family, Parenting, The Urban Daddy

Big Changes at The Urban Daddy: Welcoming Our Newest Addition!


We have made some significant changes at The Urban Daddy because change is good!  Besides, what is better than a Daddy blogger?  A Daddy blogger AND a Mommy blogger!

Joining The Urban Daddy will be The Urban Twin Mommy, who brings the experience and expertise of parenting twins (one boy and one girl – both, coincidentally, are 5-years-old!)!

Here is The Urban Twin Mommy;

“Thanks for welcoming me to the world of The Urban Daddy! While I’m not a daddy, I’m definitely not your typical mommy.

Aside from being a mom of the most delicious, obnoxious, beautiful, pain-in-the-ass twins (who everyone fondly refer to as The Bears), my friends will tell you that I’m likely the most honest, no bullshit mom you’ve met. Here are a few mantras I live by:

My kids can be assholes, so can yours.

Not all babies are cute! My son was born beautiful, my daughter looked like my husband on a chicken body (luckily, she’s grown into herself and is stunning, in my unbiased opinion).

I love my husband, he loves me and we try not to maim or kill each-other while trying to raise two little humans.

I don’t lie to my kids. I explain the reality in a way their almost 5-year-old brains can comprehend. Or I tell them to ask Daddy.

Hubby can be an asshole. I can be a bigger asshole.

Postpartum depression f@#$ing sucks. I had it. I talk about it. I’ll keep talking about it until the world understands what it is and how it can affect moms.

I swear like a sailor. I don’t apologize for it. Apparently, it’s a sign of intelligence… who knew?!

I often walk the line between ‘Super Awesome Fun’ Mom and ‘Psycho, we better call a grandparent’ Mom

Well, that’s a enough about me for the time being… I can’t give away all the intrigue, now can I?!

I’m looking forward to adding some great, regular content here, and fixing all of the spelling and grammer mistakes in all the older 1250 posts!!  (Learn to spell check, Warren!)

The Urban Twin Mommy

Follow me on Twitter @UrbanTwinMommy.  You’ll also find me sometimes @realurbandaddy, with each tweet signed off MB for Mama Bear.

I’ll also pop over to TheUrbanDaddy on Facebook to bring some more oomph to that page.  :)”

 

Please help me in welcoming The Urban Twin Mommy!

 

 

 

 

Posted in Daddy, family, Parenting, urbandaddyblog

No Tres-Passing… Once, Twice or even Three Times…


It’s amazing what you get from a 6-year-old who blends the English language with another language and processes it using their special wit and humour.

While stopped at a red light, my daughter must have noticed a sign which read;

She asked me; “What does No Trespassing mean, Daddy?”

“It means you are not allowed on that property / land… Why? Where did you see that?” I asked.

“Oh, over there, in the construction site” she answered.

Then she continued… “But I thought “trespassing” meant you had to pass the place 3 times… Like Uno, Dues, Tres… you know, Daddy… Tres-passing…”

“Ah, I know dear… Very clever!”

I love it.