I spend a lot of time on the road as a result of my business, and that means a lot of time in coffee shops working, drinking coffee and eating coffee shop food.
I’m a huge fan of Starbucks for making the space and WiFi available for entrepreneurs and I find the Second Cup comes in a very close second.
Spending time in these places means that I see a lot of people come, go, and stay at these locations and I know what the 13 things that people do at coffee shops that you should never, ever, do!
Yet, I see these, almost daily.
Here are the 13 Coffee Shop WTF’s
- Watching videos without ear phones! OMG, people do this all the time! They watch movies, or stupid YouTube videos and loudly because the coffee shops are loud. Just last week, I swear, 3 construction workers were watching porn…
- Playing games without ear phones – what’s worse than listening to some idiot watching a movie really loudly? Listening to someone playing a video game loudly. The shooting, or the music or the pings, and beeps… AArgghh.
- Dancing – On more than one occasion, I have seen men, random men, get up and start dancing in the middle of a coffee shop, in the middle of the day, and it’s most often older men, and not young men. Then, as quickly as they get up, they sit back down and continue with their day.
- Singing – Yes, people with headphones on, usually sing along with their music, and knowing that coffee shops are generally loud with music and conversation, its safe to hum along, that is until the music goes quiet, the buzz dies, and their voice rises. Then they’re entertaining the entire place, or giving us all reason to put in our ear plugs.
- Leaving your cup at the table – This is a dick move! You buy a drink, take up space, then just get up and leave your stuff everywhere. It’s usually a guy-move, the odd girl does it too. I honestly feel like getting up, grabbing their stuff, following them, and handing it to them and saying; “Dude! You mommy isn’t here to pick up after you. Put your garbage in the garbage, and never do that again!”
- Being a dick, then asking for someone to watch your stuff – So what makes someone a dick? Aside from the items identified above, and the ones below, there are other obvious signs that someone is a dick, such as dragging the chair out, even though it is really loud and distracting, then slamming your stuff on the table, having loud conversations, letting your phone ring without answering it (it can be silenced) or by the way you treat others. Then after causing destruction, you get up and ask the entire table to watch your stuff so you can use the washroom? No, so you can go outside, have a smoke, then come in smelling like an ashtray… No less that 4-times and hour…
- Not showering / putting on deodorant before sitting all day, in the sun – Then please, come in and sit beside me, so I can’t breathe! Then take off your shoes… Barf.
- Really smelly perfume / body spray / Cologne – Remember those scents which you used to love? I was always a HUGE fan of Maki. I’d smell it and then spin to see who was wearing it. I had a girlfriend when I was younger who wore it which brings back great memories. In the present, however… People are sensitive to scents, so coming in to public place smelling like you have drunken half a bottle of perfume / cologne, and it’s oozing out of your pores, is cruel. Especially those scents your grandmother used to wear 40-years-ago.
- Walking in to the mobile order area and just taking a drink – This is not cool any time, but it’s so much worse if you then telling the guy you’re with that you’re doing it, or worse, taking a drink, then taking a drink of that drink and then putting it back…
- Being a pervert – It’s summer. We get it, it’s hot, people wear less clothing – men and women – so don’t leer, drool, comment, make faces, gestures, etc. It’s gross and inappropriate. I especially feel this applies to the old men who sit there with their wives, and take it to an extreme… Watching people come and go is one thing, but checking out peoples asses as they walk by, and leering takes it to a whole different level
- Joggers – I’m a huge fan of joggers, and I respect the effort you make to run for that long, but if you want to come in and grab a drink, after a 45-minute run, in your teeny-weeny running gear, and you’re smelly, and sweating all over the chair, and table, you might want to run home first and then come and perspire over everyone.
- Farting – Here’s the deal… people fart. I get it. But if you’re in public and listening to really loud music / TV, etc., and you think you are letting a little one slip out, it’s really a very loud blast which echos because of the curvature and texture of the seat you are sitting on. That is not cool, and when you wonder why everyone is looking at you…
- Being creepy – There are creepy people and then there are creepy people. The guy / girl who stare at you like they want to steal your stuff, or ask you out are common. You learn to watch for them, but the guy who is leering at the 10-year-old girl across the coffee shop like he’s trying to picture her naked crosses a line! Or, the guy with the cell phone taking random pictures or videos of people in the place, or who keeps dropping things to see if any of the women are wearing skirts, takes creepiness to a whole new level. To that person I saw this; Everyone knows what you are doing! We want you to leave, get help, and never do that again.
What have you seen in a coffee shop which either grossed you out, or found to be inappropriate?