Posted in Life

Randomness – Yet Quite a Lot about Behinds, Bums, and… Ass


Image of "baby-cut" carrots
Image of “baby-cut” carrots (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

I’ve got stuff on my mind – too much to post at once – but some things I need to let go of, so I dropped them here into a post entitled “randomness” and I waited until there were enough to post.  For those of you following my blog for any period of time you have already realized that I am unable to tell a story by getting right to the point.  There is always a story associated with it, some background, some clarification… It’s a terrible habit.

But here are some random thoughts which have been kicking around for a while – please feel free to chime in!

How do they get those cute little baby-cut carrots? I say they’re grown that way but Urban Mummy said the go through a little mini carrot lathe like machine which whittles them down to size.

Do you know?

If you do, do you still feed them to your kids?

I found out today, May 1st that they are specially modified carrots with more sweetness and artificial colour which are peeled and cut in 2 – the baby-cut carrots that is, the baby carrot are just that – baby carrots.  To keep the carrots from drying out because they are now peeled they are soaked in a water-chlorine mixture which is rinsed off before they are bagged.

Hmmmmm.

I’m not sure how I feel about this.  I’m going to have to run this by my wife who is just about completed her holistic nutrition certification…  Update at 11.

Why are there no Meat Loaf vending machines?

Chicken, veal, beef, pork, spicy, no salt, with gravy, or ketchup… The options are endless…

Should the band Green Day not write a song for St. Patrick‘s Day.  Would this be “their” day?!?

Saw an old draft I had from Chinese New Year – There was a place near my office offering up a “Traditional Chinese New Year lunch” which was advertised as a pulled pork on a bun and a chicken wrap. Huh?!?

I saw something the other day I had never seen before and hope to never see again.  There was a boy – less than 10 years old who was standing on his hands with his feet up against the wall right under the hand dryer at the kids swimming pool.  He was drying his ass…  Oh yes.  It’s not like the change room was empty either… It was packed full of other kids and parents who didn’t seem to notice – or couldn’t care to comment on the fact this was happening.

Both my boys walked by this – strange – child without blinking an eye.  We got into the hall, I was shaking my head the whole way when Stewie broke the silence with this gem;

“Did you see that boy blow drying his ass???  That was crazy!”

“Yes, yes it was, Stewie” I replied as the 3 of us walked out of the school shaking our heads.

“Ass”.  I didn’t even know he knew that word…

Just today on my way into the office there was a woman who had just gotten off the bus and was crossing Eglinton Avenue at the light.  I noticed her because she was wearing these huge boots that came over her knees and she had a tight black miniskirt which went about mid-thigh, and she had very long braided hair.  She was listening to music and was clearly oblivious to her surroundings because as soon as she got halfway into the intersection she must have realized that her panties were falling down because she took both hands, grabbed just below her hips and pulled those suckers right back too.

Too bad for her that in doing so she lifted her skirt up to her waist and the entire street got to see her bum cheeks hanging out of her black underwear as she fixed her stuff and adjusted her skirt back to mid-thigh level.

Without missing a beat.

Oblivious.

What a way to start a morning!

Posted in Uncategorized

Chinese New Year


Begins Sunday night and is celebrated Monday.  I know very little about it other than the red envelopes with money.  Considering 3/4rs of the staff @ my office are Chinese and 3/4rs of my staff are Chinese – and are working Monday – I feel the need to learn more.

I Googled it, and here is what I found…

Chinese New Year or Spring Festival is one of the most important traditional Chinese holidays.  It is sometimes called the Luner New Year, especially by people outside China.  The festival traditionally begins on the first day of the first lunar month in the Chinese calendar and ends on the 15th; this day is called Lantern Festival.

Chinese New Year is considered a major holiday for the Chinese.   In Canada, although Chinese New Year is not an official holiday, many ethnic Chinese hold large celebrations.

The 2009 date for Chinese New Year is January 26th.  The year of the OX.

The Chinese New Year celebrations are marked by visits to kin, relatives and friends, a practice known as “new-year visits”.  New clothings are usually worn to signify a new year. The colour red is liberally used in all decorations.  Red packets are given to juniors and children by the married and elders.

Traditionally, red envelopes, or red packets are passed out during the Chinese New Year’s celebrations, from married couples or the elderly to unmarried juniors.  It is also common for adults or young couples to give red packets to children.  These packets represent “the money used to suppress or put down the evil spirit”.  In addition to the red envelopes, gifts (usually of food or sweets) are also exchanged between friends / relatives.  Common gifts include fruits (typically oranges, and never pears), cakes, biscuits, chocolates, candies, or some other small gifts.

Clothing mainly featuring the colour red is commonly worn throughout the Chinese New Year because it is believed that red will scare away evil spirits and bad fortune. In addition, people typically wear new clothes from head to toe to symbolize a new beginning in the new year

Flowers

The following are popular floral decorations for the New Year and are available at new year markets.

Floral Decor Meaning
Peach blossom symbolizes luck
Kumquat symbolizes prosperity
Narcissus symbolizes prosperity
Chrysanthemum symbolizes longevity
Bamboo a plant used for any time of year
Sunflower means to have a good year

Very interesting!