Thursday Thirteen: 13 Things I Need My Children to Remember as they Grow up.

English: Pink colour (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Often, I see lists, like the one I am posting today, about things we want our children to know, learn, remember and respect, and these lists are often quite to the point if not a little on the comedic side.  My Thursday Thirteen, however, is a little different from the norm as I have provided thirteen things that I need my children – Linus, Stewie and Boo – to remember as they grow up.  On the bright side, if they ever forget (and I have not completely embarrassed them by the time I cease blogging), they can always find it here.

As parents it is our job to teach and shape our children so that one day when they begin to develop their own opinions they will be able to use what they learned from us to shape their thoughts on things they didn’t know – so they won’t hurt anyone (especially themselves) along the way.   To do otherwise by your children, would – in my opinion – be considered failure as a parent.

Here are the thirteen things I need my kids to remember as they grow up;

13. To my boys: Pink is a colour, much as red, blue, black and green. Liking pink doesn’t mean anything except that you like the colour. If someone tells you otherwise you have to remember that it’s their problem, not yours. At some point in their life, someone tied to colour pink to a negative stereotype which simply does not exist. It’s okay to buy pink items, pink clothes and paint a room pink.

12. All (My 2 boys and my girl): Your nose is NOT an appropriate place to stick your finger – and this rule always stands, whether you are 3, 7, 8 or 38. If you do visit there, in the solitude of your own room, or home, it is NOT okay to them put that finger in your mouth, on your bed, or on your clothes. If, however, you choose to pick your nose, then you must have either a kleenex or square of toilet paper for when you are finished and wash your hands after. Remember that if your hands are dirty and you place a finger in your nose (or mouth) you are putting germs in your body. You will get sick. In addition, people think it’s yucky. Don’t be that yucky kid that turns into the yucky teen, then the creepy booger-eating adult. Please.

11. All: Respect others’ personal space and belongings. There are written rules which need to obeyed when you are in a home and there are some unwritten rules which you must follow so that you will . You need to respect others and their possessions. I know children will be children, but taking, breaking, hiding or damaging something that does not belong to you is not at all what I have in mind when it comes to creating art or playful fun. Neither is it fun to touch, push, trip or get in the face of someone for any reason. In fact, this is a lesson in doing it all WRONG! If you did this to my belongings or got in my face, I would not be happy.

10. Accept others for who they really are.  In an age where bullying has taken centre stage among our youth, I hope I have taught you to see the value in differences. Race, religion, colour, accents, or dress, interests, hair style or colour, ability or disability… It doesn’t matter.  See past it all and realize that we are all humans on this planet.

9. It is okay to cry. Crying is a natural emotional response to feelings. We all do it. Men cry. Women cry. Children cry. If you begin to cry and someone calls you a baby just remember that they learned this at home and they are being taught to hold in their emotions. Feel sorry for them but don’t allow them to change how you act or how you feel.

8. Always be proud of who YOU are. You may not be the tallest kid, or the fastest, or have the best hair, but really now, who cares? As long as you stay true to who you are, everything else will fall into place.

7. Find your passion. Keep looking and searching. Never ever stop.

6. Love this planet we live on called “Earth”. Recycle, reduce, reuse.  Go as “green” as you can by being aware of how you live, shop, and of what you consume (and where that comes from).  Now go join your mother and I hug a tree.

5. Be a brother / sister. Be a friend. Be a protector. Always be good to your family, even when there is conflict. Always remember that you are all that you have. Spouses and friends are great but at the end of the day you should know and have the support of your brother/sister when you need it.  Just don’t take advantage.

4. Smart is cool. Never be ashamed of being smart or nerdy, having freckles or glasses, or loving science and math (or tax). Smart never goes out of style, it stays with you as you grow, and it will lead you down the most successful paths you can imagine.

3. All: Your body is just that, it’s your body. You can keep your hair any way or colour that you want and you can dress any way that you want, but you must remember that others will judge you and it will impact how others treat you. So long as you understand that, you may continue. Don’t let pop culture define you. I don’t know why, but today we let pop culture manipulate our youth and it’s killing them emotionally, spiritually, and intellectually. From the early on fascination with princesses, to the ‘need’ for a boyfriend and big boobs, popularity, teen moms, and all the other garbage being thrown in their face – be confident going against the grain or you’ll risk selling yourself out.

2. Maintain your health. It’s life’s greatest asset.  Without good health you have nothing.  A positive approach to health encompasses physical, mental, social, emotional, and spiritual well-being.  Healthy lifestyle choices we taught you in your youth have already helped to lay a strong foundation for continued wellness throughout your adult life.  In addition, a healthy diet, plenty of exercise, stress management, self-motivation, and remaining positive will have a huge impact on your quality of life, health, and happiness.  Honourable mention: Never be afraid to laugh at yourself. Laughter is humbling. It inspires and motivates.  It keeps you real.

1. Wherever you are in life, you can come home. I will be here – always. ♥ Daddy. Remember children that you will all be my favourite children forever (and equally for your own strengths and inspirations). If you don’t believe me, ask Mummy. She will tell you the same thing.

Love It or List It Vancouver. My Interview with Co-Host Todd Talbot.

Love It or List It Vancouver’s Todd Talbot

A new twist on an old favourite, Love It or List It Vancouver, premièred on Monday, January 7 on W Network.  I’m sure you already know the premise of the show and if you have seen it, then you already love it.  It not, then you must tune it and see what the hype is about.

Love It or List It Vancouver showcases families in B.C.’s largest metropolitan city who are struggling with homes that no longer suit their needs.  They have either outgrown their home or the lustre has worn off which means the home owners are faced with the dilemma of whether they should love it (renovate it) or list it (put it up for sale).

The “Love it” side, features interior designer Jillian Harris, best known for her work in “The Bachelorette” and “Extreme Makeover: Home Edition” pitted against the “List it” side, featuring West Coast realtor, actor, businessman and overall real estate expert, Todd Talbot.  Jillian’s challenge is to make the owners love the house again by delivering a show-stopping renovation while Todd is determined to get home owners to relocate by dangling temptation right in front of them with dreamy homes on the market.

I have caught all three of the episodes so far, and these shows have taken viewers on an emotional roller-coaster as Jillian and Todd implemented their plans to sway the home owners to their side.  The stakes are high as the home owners weigh the financial and emotional decisions of buying a new home or staying in the renovated one — will they love it enough to stay or is it time to list?  It’s a situation that most of us have encountered or currently are dealing with which is what makes the show even that much more fun to watch.

Todd and Jillian were in Toronto recently and I had the wonderful opportunity to speak with Todd about the show, his love of real estate, his acting and find out how he juggles all of this with two young children at home.

What many may not know about Todd is that he is a professional trained stage performer who grew up learning that real estate is more than just the house you live in.  At an early age he watched his parents’ involvement in the real estate industry, through buying, selling, investing and renovating properties and that was where he began to develop his understanding of the benefits of investing in real estate and his love for renovating.  Todd is also a self-proclaimed social media junkie whom you can follow on Twitter @ToddTalbot or see more information on his personal website, here.

But check out Todd’s personal website quickly because there is a new one coming… Bigger… Better… Stronger.

Stay tuned.

Before speaking with Todd, I carefully selected 15 questions to ask him and I suspected that I would need 20-30 minutes to get through them, but I was caught totally by surprise at how awesome he was to speak with and after an hour of talking I felt that I had taken up way too much of his time, yet I wanted to keep chatting – which is why posting this was so difficult – I had so much great information and very few of them tied into the questions I had originally set out to ask.

So if you have never heard of Todd before today, here is what you should know about him;

• He’s a father of two young children whom he loves dearly and he is a devoted husband who credits the love, support and understanding of his wife with his ability to juggle fatherhood, the show and all the other stuff he does.
• The other stuff… Yes.  He is a professionally trained actor and has appeared on stage and on TV too many times to list here, so you are going to have to follow the link to his blog and check it all out.
• He has a real estate marketing business which he runs with a partner and their website can be found here.
• He is passionate about real estate.  I referred to him as being a quintuple threat because of his in-depth knowledge and understanding of the markets, renovating, buying and selling houses, investing in real estate and marketing.
• He has a hard time saying no to new business ventures.

This man does it all, and when you look at him on TV you would never know because he looks so darn young (and he’s only a year younger than I am).

But once he speaks, you understand how knowledgeable he is, how educated he is and how passionate he is.  This show is perfect for him because it ties his acting with his passion and that makes the show worth watching.

I asked him this question; “People may not be familiar with your considerable body of work, so how would you best explain yourself in 140 characters (or more if necessary).  What would you like them to know?” but very quickly realized that he had answered this over and over again throughout our conversation, and I think my bulleted comments above go a long way towards explaining what he is all about.  Plus he’s on Twitter, so follow him, and see for yourself (he’d love it).

I was also curious about the length of time, on average, that it takes to go through all the requirements for a show – from finding the potential couples, meeting them, showing them houses and / or renovating their house, etc. in order to get that one hour (or 42 minutes) of viewing ready?   In response to this question, I was astounded to find out that the shoot process (filming) is around six-weeks from start to finish, but the entire process from finding people, getting permits, the renovations, etc., take much longer.  Todd did share with me that in some cases he had provided the home owners with very detailed information on camera during the taping and when it came to air, his comment to them was edited to something like, “It looks nice”.    At least the home owners know the real story and used that to make their decision.

I asked him if he would be able to provide a general answer to someone who wanted to know if it made sense to move houses, or renovating their current house based on the current market conditions in Vancouver and would his advice change if interest rates were up at 5% instead of in the 1% range?

To that question, Todd provided me with the response I expected, which is that he would need to assess each situation on a case-by-case basis.  Obviously with interest rates being this low for so long, anyone who got into the market is reaping the benefit of being able to maximize their mortgage payments, however, jumping in at these low rates and just being able to make the minimum payment is never a good idea because when interest rates rise (and they will rise) it may force the home owner to sell or miss payments, which can lead to foreclosure.

We also spoke about the real estate “bubble” and whether the recent reduction in house prices in Vancouver was a sign that the bubble was bursting to which Todd and I again came to the same conclusion, that there was no bubble, and the bubble that economists have been predicting will burst for the past 10 years have to admit that even in such a depressed period, house prices are rising and that might be the way it stays for a long while.  Waiting for the bubble to burst is not a good reason to wait to buy a new house, I remember Todd saying, and for those who have waited and continue to wait, they are losing out on the satisfaction a new house would bring them.

And with that question, I thanked Todd for his time and told him I should be able to have this post in draft form in a day or two which could not have been further apart from how long it took me to take all this great information and put it into a post which did the show justice, him justice and explained why on Monday’s on WNET, you should be watching Love It or List It Vancouver.

I hope I just did.

Enjoy the show.

Related articles

• Vancouver real estate market crash? Not so much… (vancouverobserver.com)

TD Canada Trust Panel Discussion: Parental Leave and Finances… Which came first?

Finance (Photo credit: Tax Credits)

On Wednesday October 17th, I will be joining a select roundtable of fellow bloggers along with financial experts John Tracy and Krystina Fraser from TD Canada Trust to discuss the financial realities of having children. 

As a parent, you already know first hand that having children can be quite expensive, so the purpose of this discussion is to help TD Canada Trust help us, their customers, get a better understanding of the challenges parents face when preparing their personal finances for the arrival of their child(ren) and for parental leaves.

I was fortunate enough to take a paid parental leave to be home with my wife for the birth of our first two children.  I took 9 months off with Linus and then 4 months off when Stewie was born.  Since we planned on both being home we had to ensure our finances remained in order well in advance of their births in order to  maintain our household expenses and current living style in addition to making sure I could continue to take courses when I was off (I completed my MBA). 

Just like the discussion (when) to have children usually happens well in advance of the first child being born, so too should begin the discussion about how to best get your personal finances in order for when the child(ren) arrive and for any parental leave(s).  All it takes to begin the discussion is a budget covering your current financial situation, followed by several mock budgets covering off life and expenses while pregnant, then in preparation for birth when the furniture needs to be purchased or borrowed, the car seat (possibly a new car as we had to do), a stroller, and clothes, etc., and then another budget for after baby comes which covers off the costs of items like diapers, baby toys, bigger clothes, nanny vs day care, programs, then schools…  The budgets must be revisited whenever your financial situation changes in order to make sure everything remains on track.

It absolutely never ends which is why getting your finances in order ahead of time makes the most sense and if you plan really well you might even have some left over pocket change to begin a RESP. 

Prior to the event, I would like to collect questions from you guys which I can table during the discussion and I will share the details after in a post.  Hopefully you will want to also share some insight on how you prepared financially for the arrival of your child(ren), or if you didn’t, how you have handled your finances since the arrival of your child(ren). 

You can also follow along the discussion on Twitter through #TDParentalLeave.

In addition, the great folks at TD Canada Trust have given me a $100.00 Indigo gift card which I will raffle off among those of you who “like” or comment on the post on my blog, Facebook page, LinkedIn, Google + or Twitter.  This contest closes Wednesday at noon, Toronto-time so get moving on it right away.

Happy 6th Birthday Stewie!

Happy 6th Birthday Stewie!

Stewie!

Finally you are 6-years-old today (tonight to be more specific). Wow.

To be honest, it kind of feels like you’ve been 6 for a long time already.   You and you almost 8-year-old brother are often mistaken for twins.  You eat the most at one seating than your family, including me, and I’ve been known to pack back the food in my day.  You are strong like a bull, like your father, which you proved to us and a bunch of 6-year-old’s when you singlehandedly helped your team win a tug-of-war where you were the anchor.  You are driven, determined, serious, focussed and everything else that people look at and follow up with “wow”.  Quite frankly if I didn’t see your birth with my own eyes, I would have thought you were switched at birth.

I mean you are the reason why I herniated the disc in my back – because until you were 10 months old, you refused to sleep more than 2-3 hours at a time.  I carried you morning, noon and night – even though all you wanted was food and mummy.   Mummy also had Linus to take care of, so it was me or the cry-way.  Tough luck for you!   You were stuck with me.

Looking back now I should have known how you would be at 6-years-old… When you were born – a planned home birth – your breathing was shallow so the mid-wives stepped out of our bedroom to call 911 (forgetting that our parents were on the main floor listening and becoming quite worried - I remember my mother calling me as the mid-wives were explaining that calling for backup just in case was a standard practice from babies with shallow breathing - asking me if everything was alright because she heard the call, whereas we did not.  But after seeing what you did when you were given oxygen by the mid-wives - you ripped the tube from your mouth over and over again, we all knew you would be just fine!  You didn’t want it.  You didn’t need it.  You didn’t have it.

Fast forward to today and you are the same size and weight as your 7-year-old brother.  You look older than you are, you act older than you are and you have an old soul who comes across as a kind, compassionate boy who asks really great questions – some not so great mind you (If Big Show fought all the birds in the world, who would win?).

You love school but get frustrated that you’re not learning fast enough – like after the 2nd day when you wanted to quit school because you were colouring with crayons and you could do that at home, you certainly didn’t need to go to school for that – and you get frustrated when your classmates talk during class or (gasp) try to talk to you when there is work to be done.  You also somehow failed to mention to us last year that you were reading at a beginning grade 2 level when you were finishing senior kindergarten.  You excel at karate and swimming.  You are a trusting friend until someone does you wrong, then you have a memory of an elephant, yet your big brother is your best friend and your worst enemy at the same time.  You two fight, then within a few minutes you’ve made up and are playing together again like nothing happened.

You have a very strong sense of justice, and as a result you always protect your brother and sister and I’ve often told the story about how, when you were 2-years-old, a 6-year-old boy took your brother’s balloon. After he had asked for it back, unsuccessfully, you stepped in and grabbed this boy by the shirt, looked him in the eyes and said “I’m going to throw you in the garbage!”  He handed you the balloon and quickly walked away.  You passed that balloon to your brother and went on playing like nothing happened.

You are a piano whiz, and you said you want to try the violin and learn your way up, trying all the string instruments, until you get to the big ones, like a cello.

When asked what you want to be when you grow up, you replied with; “Everything!” I finally got you to confirm it was because you wanted to know what you would really be good at want to do for the rest of your life.

When I blog about things you have said, like punching G-d, my hits go through the roof.  You’re very funny, and the reason we started a Twitter account for you, called @LittleBoyPurple which we don’t update any more, but you probably will one day because you’re a hoot!

So, son, I want to wish you a very happy 6th birthday.  I love you and please, keep feeding me the material, and let me know when that middle child syndrome has set in. 

Some Father’s Day Thoughts… Move over for the NEW Dads!

With Father’s Day fast approaching, I came across some interesting thoughts and statistics from Insight Strategy Group’s marketing and gender expert, Jen Drexler on how the “New Dad” is evolving in modern times.

I read it over and asked for permission to re-post it because I think it really summarizes the change in the role of the Dad / Father over the past 10-15 years.  I do things my father did not do, and I’m certain he did things his father would never have done and I can already see my kids will be doing things that I would never have dreamed of doing.

So please give Jen’s thoughts below a read and let me know what you thought.  Mothers and fathers!

—————————————————————————————-

THERE’S A NEW DAD TO CELEBRATE THIS FATHER’S DAY

Fathers’ Day has always been about buying Dad a tie or aftershave, and letting him play golf in peace for the afternoon. But in 2012, we might be saying goodbye to barbecues and hello to brunch because there’s a new dad in town.

This guy is the kind of father who sees taking care of his kids as a social badge of honor. Society is warming up to their kind, who you might find enjoying a Daddy play date in the park on the weekend, or pushing a stroller in Target.  At home, they might even be folding laundry or cooking breakfast – Parenting Magazine cites that 26% of Dads do all the grocery shopping and 22% do all the cooking.

Let’s face it though: some Dads found themselves here as a result of the recession. Men lost 4 million jobs in the man-cession – 2 million more than women since 2007 – according to the Bureau of Labor Statistics. But once home, many dads were surprised that they actually liked being there – they found they were good at chores, raising kids, and taking care of their wives. Whether they are working or stay-at-home dads, men are finding their sensitive sides, discovering the emotional rewards of modern parenting, and dropping some of the traditional machismo that they were raised with.

This new class of fathers should give marketers a way to liven up the hum-drum routine of marketing Father’s Day. So, how should marketers cater to the “new dad” in 2012? Imagine what it would look like if they borrowed a lesson from Mother’s Day:

· What would happen if Dad was actually pampered, instead of being given a power tool? Imagine rewarding this new Dad with gifts like spa services like MAN-icures.

· Could restaurants get in on the action and host Daddy-Daughter dinners for more quality time on this special day?

· Could florists find a way to man-size flower arrangements, so that every dad would look forward to receiving that delivery?

Advertisers are already getting in on the new Dad action and using them to tug at our heartstrings in emotional spots, like:

· Google Plus’s recent commercial tells the endearing story of a first time dad who loses his cell phone containing all his baby pictures, but is relieved to find that he didn’t lose them at all- they were automatically stored in his Google Plus account. Time for a collective phew, right?

https://plus.google.com/113116318008017777871/posts/5YHwRCmPxCY

· Subaru gets the tears flowing in their ad called “Baby Driver” featuring a dad handing over the keys to the car to his daughter who he sees as a 7-year-old awkwardly behind the wheel promising to be careful. (Interestingly, the father and daughter were not actors playing the part, but a real family.)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2qf8OGLqE1s

Let’s hope marketers pay attention in authentic and sincere ways because this year, this new type of dad deserves a new type of Father’s Day. Here are some findings from a study that Insight did for Spike TV  about dads to support these suggestions for marketers, and for anyone looking to support Dad this year!:

The “new” dad is a nurturing dad vs. the traditional, straight provider dad. For New Dad, parenting is most important, for traditional dad, it was just one of a number of equally or even more important things in their life…

- 88% of dads today say they feel emotionally connected to their kids, as opposed to 35% of traditional dads.

- 89% of dads currently show open affection to their kids, as opposed to 34% of the traditional dad we grew up with…

- 81% of dads today are available for their kids anytime they want them, as opposed to 34% of traditional dads.

- 79% of dads now take time to have good conversations with their kids, as opposed to 34% of the traditional, ‘busy’ dad.

- 68% of dads are confidantes for their kids, as opposed to 25% of traditional dads.

- 77% of dads listen to their kids talk about their worries and problems as opposed to 29% before, when Moms took on much more of this activity.

- 74% of dads seek to be a shoulder to cry on for their kids, as opposed to 26% of traditional dads, who again, looked to Mom for this role.

- 69% of “the new” dads drive their kids places, as opposed to 30% of traditional dads.

- 63% of dads often watch their kids, as opposed to 18% of traditional dads.

- 42% of “new dads” stay home with sick kids vs. 11% of traditional dads

- 55% of dads these days cook for their kids, up from 20%.

- 60% of the new hands-on dads say they have an “excellent” relationship with their kids, as opposed to 38% of traditional dads.

- Interestingly, today’s very engaged dads are only 2% happier with their life overall than traditional dads — 42% and 40% respectively.

“Fathers today expect more fulfillment even if they don’t know how to get it,”says Jen Drexler. “Dads realize that for them, unlike for their own Dads, it’s now acceptable, or even preferable to be emotionally there for their kids.”

—————————————————————-

ABOUT INSIGHT STRATEGY GROUP

Insight Strategy Group is a research-driven strategy firm that inspires its clients to build innovative and impactful experiences for consumers. Insight’s business savvy team of social scientists melds quantitative muscle with qualitative finesse to meet its client’s strategic challenges. Insight gets to the deeper truth of what drives people and their relationships to brands, and opens possibilities for growth.

Founded in 1999, Insight Strategy Group leverages backgrounds in the social sciences to help clients crack their toughest business challenges. With an expertise in predicting trends and fueling innovation, their research and consumer savvy allows clients to tap into emerging consumer needs. Insight is based in Tribeca, NYC. Find Insight at http://www.insightstrategygroup.com.

JEN DREXLER, Vice President, Insight Strategy Group

Jen brings her straight shooting style,her uncanny knack for trend spotting, and her strategic thinking to Insight as an authority on trends in gender and what it means for marketers. Jen is sought after for her non-traditional qualitative research approaches and her expertise on gender roles and drivers. Jen has experience working with a multitude of categories, including retail, fashion, media, consumer packaged goods, and more.

Previously she was the co-founder of Just Ask a Woman and co-authored “What She’s Not Telling You: Why Women Hide the Whole Truth and What Marketers Can Do About It.” (2010). Earlier in her career she worked as a futurist for Faith Popcorn’s BrainReserve and in public relations.

Thursday Thirteen: Parenthood the third time through. Thirteen things I don’t recall the other kids doing

Damn.

I have been maintaining this blog since just before the birth of our oldest son, Linus, which would be 2004, and at that time – as you can attest to – with your first-born you make note of everything from lack of sleep to rolling over, to loosing teeth.  Once the second child arrived, there were some comparisons made to the first child, but there were also situations where we had to think about whether Linus had done what Stewie was now doing.  Then came Berry, and it was forget about it.  By 3, you know they are not going to die if they cry for 5 minutes, and that rash… It’ll go away.  Oh, she threw up?  Let’s watch her and kiss of sleep tonight.

But there has been some things recently which makes me think back to Linus and Stewie to see if each child did this, or if it’s just for us the third time around.

13.  Germs and dirt: Either we have a germ-a-phobe on our hands or I forgot what it’s like have a 2-year-old, or possibly it’s just a girl thing, but Berry went through a phase where for about 2 weeks she refused to bathe because the tub was dirty, or sit on a toilet seat if the toilet was dirty.    Funny, yet frustrating it how I would describe it.

12.  Language: “Linus is an idiot!  He’s an ASS”.  I do not for the life of me recall Linus using language like this towards anyone.  Classmates, us, his brother or his sister, however little spark plug Stewie blurts it out daily now.

11.  Nutrition: “How much sugar is in milk?  How much fibre is there?  Iron?”  This was Berry to me the other morning as she was eating cereal and reading the box and the jug of milk.  She was quizzing me…  I don’t recall my boys at 2 1/2 doing this.

10.  Food issues:  Linus will stand beside a plate of cookies, without touching them, and point to them and politely ask if he can have one.  Stewie… Dives in and stops when we catch him.  I think with Berry we just keep her away so Stewie won’t influence her.

9.  Picky eaters.  Linus ate everything as a baby.  Urban Mummy made all his food from scratch and he loved spinach, eggs, fruits, veggies, and yogurt.  As he got older he got pickier to the point now that he’d be happy with plain noodles and bread.  Stewie, the human garbage can was always picky to some extent but when he likes something he inhales it, ie. 5 mini-pizzas for dinner, 5 green apples a day, 2 english cucumbers for a snack, but in the last week he’s off everything.  “I don’t like that anymore”.  Berry… Very picky and all over the place.  She starts eating what we have for dinner then when she sees the boys eating something else she wants that too, then after the meal is over she’s had 9 different things.  I honestly have no idea what her favourite foods are…

8.  Bathing.  Linus is a fish.  Stewie HATED the water and when him and I did swimming lessons, he spent the first lesson clinging to me keeping every inch of his body out of the water.  It terrified him.  Berry, hated the water too, having never done swimming lessons, and freaking out in the bath when I tried to wash her hair.  Now she likes it but I recall both boys hating to have their hair washed… I believe.  It’s the bath blur.

7.  Motoring (or motor-mouth): All 3 of my kids walked late – 15 months – nd talked early, in some cases stringing together 2-3 words before the age of 1, but I have the feeling that Berry’s vocabulary is the best!  She strings together smart sentences and they surprise me most of the time.  The other day I took the many decorative pillows off our bed and placed them on the floor.  In walked Berry and said this; “Oh, why are all the pillows on the floor?  Did you put them there, Daddy?  They don’t belong on the floor, they’ll get dirty… Silly.  I’ll help you move them”.  Whew.

6.  Sleep… Oh sleep.  Linus has always been a very sound sleeper – he slept through Stewie’s birth (a planned home birth)  at the age of 22 months.  Stewie slept for 2-3 hours at a time for 10 months which makes him a not so good sleeper.  Berry gets into bed and sings, talks and plays for what seems to be hours.  I don’t remember if the boys played like this because we were too exhausted at that time to pay attention and who knew there would be three of them to compare too…

5.  Sports:  My boys never liked sports.  I’m pretty sure getting them to try hockey or baseball was difficult but with Berry it’s different  She flips out not when I ask her to play but when she cannot participate.  She loves sports.  Granted, when there is sports on the TV, she says; “Daddy, is this basketball?  Hockey?  Wrestling?”  LOL.  She cannot tell them apart but she’s going to be a star.  Competitive and focussed.  Yay.

4.  Technology:  Linus’ first word was iPod.  Stewie iPhone and Berry, well it should have been iPad.  But Berry can open up and set up that iPad and get her games working and move through them with ease.  I can’t recall if my boys were as proficient at that age.  Sure now, I’ll give my iPad to Linus to fix, but Berry gets it too..

3.  Wrestling:  I love wrestling.  It makes me laugh and no one is allowed to watch it, but if it’s 0n sometimes they catch a glimpse.  Until recently Linus and Stewie had zero interest in wrestling.  Now it’s somehow become part of their lives as it did mine growing up.  Linus asks if Mark Henry can life our treadmill, Stewie compared a distance of 7-feet to the height of the Great Khali and Berry runs around my house making the hand gestures and sounds that Kane does before he sets the ring post on fire.  She also loves Brodus Clay’s theme song, and we’ll catch her singing “Gonna call my momma… ya ya ya ya!”

2.  Religion:  Linus goes to a private Jewish day school.  Stewie went to public school last year and is at the same school as his brother.  Linus thinks the world started by G-d when Adam and Eve were placed on the earth.  Stewie said, no its the big bang and evolution and dinosaurs were on the planet first.  Berry, on the other hand is going to a very religious Jewish nursery school and is the more religious of the 3 of them and that makes me laugh since we’re not that observant.  At least they’ll have each other to speak Hebrew to, since I have no idea what they’re saying.

1.  Respect.  It might just be the mob mentality, but when the three get going we fear for our lives.  LOL.  But seriously, Linus was respectful growing up, testing the limits every now and them but understanding his place.  Stewie on the other hand has no qualms about telling us how much he dislikes his brother or me for “wanting to kill him (read sending him to his room where he won’t get to come out ever or eat or drink water).  He’s a little dramatic.  Berry has been observing her brothers and we’re kind of hoping she stays happy and loving and follows neither of her brothers.  I doubt that will remain the same.

Tell me about your kids… If you have more than one does the memory fade away or what have you done to preserve it?

Related articles

• Are you hungrier than a 5-year-old? (urbandaddy.wordpress.com)
• Ah, those kids and the things they say… Was I this clever / funny as a kid? I doubt it. (urbandaddy.wordpress.com)
• Stuff Stewie Said This Weekend: Random Comments of a 5-Year-Old Boy (urbandaddy.wordpress.com)
• About the Urban Daddy (urbandaddy.wordpress.com)

As a Father, if you’re going to disappoint some of them, you might as well disappoint all of them…

I wanted to post this last week when it happened but did not get a chance but since that night this scenario has come up over and over again, just not to the same extent.

The night it first happened, was a special night in the Urban Daddy household.  Determined to get back into some semblance of an exercise routine, I made up my mind early in the day that I would run on the treadmill that evening, by hook or by crook.

Since I’m still within my 3 month window of a new job with much greater responsibility, and the stress / excitement of meeting new people, learning new systems, figuring out acronyms and being on my toes all the time, I have found myself quite exhausted by about 10pm, which means that is around the time I tend to fall asleep on the couch when trying to; watch TV, read, blog, play Cityville, or… exercise.  Very unusual for me as I’m used to 1-2am sleeps with 6am wake-ups.

This night was exercise night and the beginning of a new schedule for me.

New Routine – Thursday night.:

Eat dinner with the kids (not unusual at all)

Stewie piano lessons

Give Berry a bath

Linus annoy mummy during math lesson

Then switch…

Linus piano.

Berry and Stewie before bed snack.

All kids in bed by 8:15 and I’m going to treadmill for 1/2 hour before I have a shower, then run out to grab milk.  I really want to begin getting to bed at a reasonable hour – it is currently 12:33am so that is not happening.

Then it all fell apart.

Urban Mummy wanted to talk to me.  We didn’t talk much the previous night and she barely saw me today and she wanted to chat but I patted my flabs and said, “Sorry hun!  I have to treadmill”.  She was disappointed.

I went to check on the kids and here is what happened;

Walked into Stewie’s room, and surprisingly he was still awake.

“Stay with me, Daddy”, he said.

“Sorry kiddo.  I have to treadmill right now so I can shower, get milk and talk to your mother before she falls asleep or kills me”.

He was disappointed.

I went from there to Linus’ room where he was sitting up in his bed too.

“Lay with me, Daddy and tell me a story, please”.

“Can’t buddy.  Have to go treadmill before mummy goes to sleep.

He gave me his pouty disappointed face.

Out I marched and right into Berry’s room where surprisingly she was up too.

“Rub my back and stay with me Daddy”, she said.

“Sorry, sweetie, I have to treadmill.  Sing for me and I will tuck you in when I’m done.”

She was not happy either because she didn’t sing for me and she usually does.  “Bla Bla Blacksheet”

Out I walked.

4 people wanted me to stay with them and 4 people got nothing.

Like I said in the title.  Go big or go home.  If you’re going to disappoint someone you might as well disappoint all of them.

Dads…  You turn.  What would you have done?

Related articles

• Ah, those kids and the things they say… Was I this clever / funny as a kid? I doubt it. (urbandaddy.wordpress.com)
• Should I be concerned that my kids are smarter than me? (urbandaddy.wordpress.com)
• Are you hungrier than a 5-year-old? (urbandaddy.wordpress.com)

And the Academy Award for the Largest Ego for a Spoiled Athlete(s) goes to… The Miami Heat.

I just realized the Academy Awards were on the same night as the NBA all-star game.  Oops.  Different genres of people, I guess.

I watched the 2nd half of the NBA All-Star game because at the end of the first half the score was something insane like 109-88 for the Western Conference which meant the Miami Heat threesome of LeBron (I am the King) James, Dwayne (I can win on my own and don’t need these clowns) Wade and… oh yeah that third wheel and former Raptor Chris (Can I please ride on your coat-tails) Bosh, were losing.  Yay.  so I continued watching hoping for the Eastern conference to lose even though my Raptors play in the East.

But to my utter enjoyment, the East made a game of it, LBJ was putting up 3-pointer after 3-pointer.  It was incredible.  Sure they were down by 20 points, but that is when LBJ is at his best, right? because when push came to shove, it was LBJ who missed a key 3, and then Wade dropped a long-bomb pass which would have been an easy lay-up and probable East win.  Even on the last shot of the game, LBJ didn’t want to take it, he passed it off. 

They choked. He choked.

History repeats itself.

And when the camera panned to LBJ, he was laughing and shrugging his shoulders like it was nothing.  Then while being interviewed he played it off even more along the lines of it doesn’t really matter, the game is over.

It does matter.  LBJ knows he is not the most popular player in the league and that he is slowly developing a reputation of being a bit of a choke artist.  It’s getting to him, and it’s clearly obvious.  He wants to win but doesn’t want that last shot.  Wade will take it.  Kobe will take it.  Even Bosh is used to taking it since he was forced to in Toronto. 

This is the same LBJ who was so popular in high school that either an agent or the school bought his mother a Hummer and when it was made public they denied it.  He’s not cut from a moral cloth to be a role model and to be honest, he’s drinking the cool-aid about how great he is (or thinks he is). 

Now having said all this, the Heat will probably win the championship this year… UGH.

—————————————————

On Sunday, I took Linus with me to a volunteer event – we, at the urban daddy household volunteer at least once a month with the kids to give back to the community – and we took part in an hour of yoga while at this event.  Let me tell you this… Dads… It was hard.  I’m sure the moms have done it numerous times and we all know woman are more flexible anyways, but for me it was tough, but as the program went on, I could really feel the stretch.  I was sore after, a little bit sweaty – not like playing ball hockey – but I knew I was in a workout.  So then after all the cobra’s, downward dogs, sunset’s, etc., the instructor informed me this was a “beginner” class.  OY.   

By Monday morning, I realized that my back was not sore when I woke up which told me need to do more yoga!

What do you have to say?

And don’t forget to like me on Facebook; https://www.facebook.com/pages/Urban-Daddy/109554365740659 

And follow me on Twitter @urbandaddyblog

Related articles

• Nicki Minaj disses NBA star (bazaardaily.com)
• LeBron easy target, even in All-Star Game (foxsportsflorida.com)

Why I ate a warm banana tonight…

Tonight I ate a warm banana.

Why you ask?

Because my stubborn daughter, Berry would not go to sleep tonight.  She had a 1 1/2 hour nap with her nanny this afternoon and that meant she was not happy to be in bed at 8pm.  She cried, she yelled, she screamed… She wanted to “eat” which meant STALLING! 

Before bed she wants to eat or poo, both opportunities for her to not have to go to sleep even if she is exhausted as I suspected she was tonight.

The Leafs were playing the Penguins and I had the TV on.

I gave her a banana and she took one bite then she leaned her head on the side of the couch while I cleaned up.  I asked her if she was ready for bed but she said no and she took the world’s smallest nibble of this banana. 

I continued cleaning, checking on her every couple of minutes.

I left the room and came back in to find this;

Here is what this urban daddy is reading

Here are the 3 books I am reading right now;

1. Honey I Wrecked the Kids – Alyson Schafer
2. Corporate Trust Program – The Trust Institute / The Institute of Canadian Bankers
3. The Follow Through Factor – Gene Hayden

At the completion of these books I will better be able to…

1. Raise my kids
2. Do my job
3. Do what I say I will do

Oh, and last night I read my son 9 chapters of Captain Underpants. He is… and interesting character, that underpants guy… I don’t remember reading silly books when I was a kid – well, I didn’t really read at all until I was 6 or 7.  I do remember reading tons of Archie comics and the sports section of every newspaper I could get my hands on. From there I graduated to the Choose Your Own Adventure series, while my sister raved about Judy Blume.

Now kids read about Professor Poppy P. Poopypants…

Cool, eh?

I’ll let you know how this works out.